December 11, 2008

I hate to send you around the net, but.....

I'm still over on Wordpress for the most part of my blogging. In fact, just all of it. But, sadly, there are some things that Wordpress won't let me do. Like put up an Entrecard. Until they do, I'll put it up here and try to persuade everyone to head over to my Wordpress account to really hear about my life, etc.

May 19, 2008

Check out....

Check out my new home, over on Wordpress. If I'm going to post, it will be there! :-)

May 10, 2008

Forgiveness

I would much rather be doing this over on Wordpress, but it doesn't seem to want to open up right now, so I guess I'll be talking about this here.

So, this afternoon, I was going through my email like I do a million times a day, and I noticed something interesting. I've mentioned my ex-best friend on here a few times, each time calling her just that, my ex-best friend because that's what she is. Well, I noticed an email from her on the one group we both happen to be in---we weren't in this one when we were friends, but we obviously came to it for much the same reason afterwards. I don't know if it existed before or not, but that's neither here nor there. But, the interesting thing about the email I noticed was her name now.

She got married. Now, you might think that, given the way we parted ways and the fact that I refer to her the way I do, I'd be nasty about this fact in one way or another---but while there were a couple interesting comments from myself and T when I talked to him about it...more than anything, I'm really really happy for her. I don't know if she reads this or not---if she does---well then, yes dear, I do check up on you once in a while, and I do notice your comings and goings at least on the one list, and I do still care some about you. I've noticed you've had some...goings on?...with your new hubby on different networking websites. And yes. I'm very happy that you have managed to find yourself someone to love. I never wanted anything less for you, even though yes I have tried my hardest to completely distance myself from you. It's not that I never had the inclination to email her either. I have sometimes, especially lately in examining myself and my newly refound Christianity. But as far as things like that, I think some things are better off left well enough alone. We've both grown quite a bit since we parted ways...it's sometimes said there are some people who are there with you for a time and a season, and some special people are there for a lifetime. I think with her, it was just for a time. A long time---13 years. I've had closer friends for much longer :-| Mhmmm...much closer :-S :-P Much longer.

The reason I think all this is possible? Because of forgiveness. Now, I'm not saying (in case she's reading) that the exact reason why we parted ways (if you don't know what it is, honey, I feel really sorry for you. It's obvious and even your mother knows.) is all I'm forgiving her for either. That's it's own issue, but I've dealt with our side of that. No, there are things that happened before that...in the year or so before it, that cut me much deeper. I was feeling unsettled about it before we parted ways, but I was willing to at least put up with it for that time. I wrote a post where I talked about forgiving her. It took a while to find it, but I did. And I think this is the first place God really worked in my life. Because within just months, I felt NOTHING when I (think I) saw her. If it was her, then I'm sure she knows when I'm talking about. And I've now come around to the point where I'm happy to hear about such a wonderful event in her life---well, 2. Because she got married in April, and of course her birthday was yesterday, the 9th (You didn't think I really forgot, did you?). I'm happy to see her smile in one of the pictures I've seen of her, because I know how good it feels to feel that happy and be that in love, and I'm happy to see she's found that in someone. Because she was never as happy as she could be when she was with the guy who she was with when we parted ways. I'm glad someone's made an honest woman of her, she deserves it. We all deserve the love and happiness being truly in love can bring.

Bouncing...

I don't know if this is a good thing or anything, but I'm going to be bouncing back and forth between here and my new WordPress blog for a while. I see why everyone's over there, but I can't make it my permanent home until I know whether or not I've got the loan from the credit union for the Fast Start Pack. Hopefully I'll know that Monday or something. How nice it will be to get those boxes, and have all those candles. It will be like Christmas. We'll even have samples of the scents, which is a big thing, and kinda part of the disagreement I had with T was about the other day. Things are better now. Hopefully they will keep getting better. That's what I'm praying for at least, ha ha.

So, if you want to see what else I'm up to, come on over to my other blog, at Wordpress :-)

May 08, 2008

Contest results!!!

Thank you to everyone who played!!!

All 4 of you!!!

We ended up with only 4 entries. In an odd twist of events, everyone won. Really.

We decided on a point value for each of the places, and that resulted in 2 entrants getting one total, and the other 2 getting another. So....

Congrats to Jim from BusyDad (or not so busy :-\) and Sandy from Momisodes, who tied for first place. You will soon be getting your jar candles!

Congrats also to Witchypoo from Psychicgeek and Elizabeth from A Calm in the Chaos. You will soon be getting your set of 6 assorted votives!

Stay tuned for the Father's Day contest! Which will start right after Mother's Day, on Monday!

And will (a) be in poll form and (b) will be on my new blog, over on Wordpress! Now I see why everyone's over there! :-)

Disclaimer---if I have any references wrong, please correct me!

Just a note...

The Mother's Day Memory Contest is now over! We received some good entries, and we will be taking care of the voting tonight and tomorrow (hopefully morning). I will post the winning entries as soon as we have the votes tabulated, and I will be emailing the winners for their addresses (if I don't already have them) then too!

Thank you to everyone who entered, this was certainly an interesting experience! I will be using a poll next time, as I will have more time and this is...difficult to say the least!

Have a good night!

May 07, 2008

The day is finally here!

And wow did it come quick!

Today is that day! To get your entries in so that Lou, Mary and I can look them over, and make our final decisions! I hope everyone who's been through here is deciding what they are going to write for their entry! I'm really looking forward to reading everyone's entries. It's not going to be easy, I know, but it's going to be fun! I will post the winners either last thing tonight (though I'm planning on going to bed really early tonight, since I've had a few later nights than I wanted), or first thing tomorrow morning.

May 06, 2008

Other than this headache I've got, today's looking pretty good. In just about half an hour I've got to head off for weigh in, I'm hoping for another couple pounds off, even though with my toe I didn't get in nearly as much walking as I did last week. That's okay, I look forward to more later this week :-)

I think the headache started with an Oreo cookie. I seem to get problems with coffee and chocolate, which is disappointing, because what woman doesn't love chocolate. Speaking of which, let me just say that a chocolate covered Justin Timberlake was NOT my idea! As soon as I read that, I asked what demographic was he trying to get? Oh well...you can always insert the hunk of your choice. I'd pick Vincent D'Onofrio, especially in this The Cell days, or T any time. Hee hee. :-D Or Craig Ferguson. Yeah, you know, I've never liked the same guys everyone else likes. I'm just individual that way. But Justin? Ugh!

May 05, 2008

Monday and weekend over view



Hello all. Please don't forget about my contest! I'm really looking forward to everyone's entries! The time is getting short! I'll also have a Father's Day one (my dad's pretty terrific too, LOL!), so don't think this will be your only chance to win one of the prize packs!!!

This weekend was okay. It's really such a relief to know I don't have to do a thing involving the Penny Saver route! I'm able to move through my weekend relaxed and with confidence. Now I just have to put that relaxation and confidence into my business, and it will be booming!!! :-)

I was fairly productive this weekend. I cleaned off the outside of the fridge and the front of one of my cabinets, all of my wash is (gasp!) caught up, and most of my rooms look good! Today I got upstairs to bring some stuff up, and I brought down a box of toys for P to play with here in the computer room. Included in that are some legos and a few puzzles---the legos were ALL OVER THE FLOOR this evening! The great thing is he contributed in cleaning up! I never really did that with her---and look where we are now :-|

I'm hoping for some good prospects on my candle biz from T's work. A friend of his that T had asked me to give a sample to drove him over for their lunch break (T went in early today, long story), and I gave him the sample candle. Well, he just LOVED it, and ended up saying he'd give other people my card. I gave him a whole handful!!! T won't even bring my biz cards to work. Now, it's not that he doesn't love the product almost as much as I do (despite that fact that he won't admit THAT---but he is eager to give his own sorta "testimonial" and talk about the product when I do), and it's not at all like he doesn't support me...but I don't know why it is he won't bring the cards to work! Maybe he's as shy as I am about giving people my card? Maybe it brings back memories of the cold calling he had to do being a telemarketer (he was when he was out in Colorado trying to make a home for us)? But it's always amazing watching someone smell our candles for the first time. This guy said not to have him smell any because he can't smell well or something, but he just LOVED the Key Lime (April's scent). It was the first one I pulled out cause it was on top. It would have been the Pomegranate if it had shown up today. I'm really hoping for stuff to start looking up for my biz. I want it to work so bad!

No matter what anyone tells you about their home biz---it taking off right away, etc---it's not always easy to start up a business. Perhaps your biggest obstacle can be yourself. You have to have the mindset to win. I've often pondered the whole occurrence of the winner of the Biggest Loser this last time around. She said she could see it from the very first interview. I remember her saying it the first time I saw the video of her and her mother up on those screens, when they went over how much they were taking in. She mentioned it so many times (or at least they didn't edit out her mentioning it) towards the end of the season, it stuck hard in my head, especially at the end. She saw the confetti coming down over her. I've got to struggle out and see....how does that look for me? I've still got a lot of soul searching I have to do.

But I do have to say one thing. My life was touched by the most amazing woman, and by having her as my sponsor, that's the only way I wanted to get into this biz. Because she's been the most amazing support and guide through this whole thing. That's why she's one of my judges for the contest. So you know you're in good hands.

Now contribute. Please?

May 03, 2008

Mommy's First Contest

UPDATE, May 8, 2008 - 12:01am --> The Contest is now over! Thank you to all the contestants!



Yes, babies, Mommy's having her VERY FIRST contest. And it's going to be an easy one (for the participants at least). Unfortunately it's going to be a QUICK one too, so I can have the prize out for the winner before or as close to Mother's Day as possible!

This contest is in honor of Mother's day. If you are a regular enough reader, you might know that my mom is one of my absolute best friends, and she's been on a long hard road since August 2004. I want to honor her with this contest.

Here's the requirements:

1. On or before May 7th, 2008, email me (angelgal2876 at gmail dot com) your favorite memory of your mom. This is where it can get interesting---your story doesn't have to be about your birth mom. If you are adopted, make it about your adopted mom. If your mom is gone, but your dad filled in the space wonderfully, tell me about him. If someone stepped in at some point during your adult life and filled in the role of mother for you, let me know about them.

2. In order to keep your contact information secure and give you another chance at winning a jar candle, please go to my candle biz site and fill in the contest drawing form. It's not a must, but it's HIGHLY ENCOURAGED. Your information will be kept confidential. Feel free to browse my site some too

The only people ineligible for this contest are those directly related to the judges or myself.

Now, as for what you will win...



1st prize - one 16oz jar candle from my stash (I will email you with the choices)

2nd and 3rd prizes - 6 votives from my stash

The judges:

The great Lou, over on LouCeel.

My WONDERFUL sponsor for the candle biz, Mary Leedy at Success By Candlelight Coach.

Now, hurry up and get your submissions in! I can't wait to hear about YOUR mom!!!

P.S. There will be one for dad starting just after Mother's Day, too! That one will run much longer!!! Promise!

If you want to advertise my contest on your site, please feel free to take this:



Not a Sunny Saturday

At least, not outside. Inside it's been better



Hey all! Don't forget to enter my contest, okay? I'm looking forward to seeing everyone's favorite memories of their mother! You've only got 4 more days! If everyone else's memory is like the ones we've already got---we're going to need a whole pallet of tissues! Wow!

Today's been another productive day. I did a lot of cleaning, the dishes are actually----hold on to your hat---DONE! Except for the bowl and spoon next to me (which I'm going to go wash off) and anything that might be in the living room that I didn't know about. My futon is organized, the boxes at the bottom of the stairs are organized, my CDs have been organized. I made dinner (albeit a bit late), P was in bed and asleep by 11 (considering he didn't fall asleep until midnight last night, that's good!), I even wiped down my counter and my cooktop! I've got to pick up my living room (D said she was going to, but she's asleep), and fold some clothes, then I'm hitting the sack until it's time to get up for church! Socks and the papers here on the desk plus the top of the fridge and maybe the shelves and top of the freezer can happen tomorrow!

I'm looking forward to church tomorrow. D's got a Girl Scout thing, so I'm going to be going to the 11am service. I had to miss it last week because I did the March for Babies. I haven't walked nearly that much since Wednesday. My poor toe---it's doing better. Looking forward to being able to get out and walk again. I think that's where all of my energy is coming from.

But it's starting to run out. so I've got to go so I can do those clothes and the toys in the living room!

May 02, 2008

Phew!

Wow, but today has certainly been BUSY! The biggest thing, obviously, is setting up the contest---I can't stand that it's going to be so short, but I just thought of it and I really want to have the prizes out by Mother's Day.

And my evening isn't over yet, even though here it's after midnight! I've got a few more ideas for Blog Hoppin' and the contest (though I guess I could do the Blog Hoppin' tomorrow), and I've got more work I'd like to do in the kitchen.

Speaking of which, over the last week I've done some really good organizational work on my kitchen. Just this evening I arranged in and around my breadbox (which I don't actually use for bread, because it seems every time I put bread in a breadbox, it doesn't get used and turns all moldy. And I even went and got this one special, when I found it I just HAD to have it, it looks so nice. But explain that for me, will ya? I guess it's just my family [read: hubby] and the way bread is consumed in this house), cleared out my fridge (gotta clean it out too...take out the shelves and wash them down :-S Ewww...), and now I'm working on one of my non-food storage cabinets. It's got 3 shelves, I've already got one cleared out. The top one is for completely non-food things because the ceiling over it has leaked since we moved in. Any time anything is put up there, T has a small freak-out session. The next will have all our meds and vitamins (all over the counter stuff mind you, since NO ONE in this house takes medication daily. Something that with my family medical history always mystifies me. But I better shut up so I don't jinx myself!), and I'm not sure what. I'm not sure about the last either. Though I get the idea this time it will be cleared out much further than the last few times I have done so. I'm starting to think I do this whole clean and sort out the house every year or so. Does that mean I'll eventually get us to the point where we have nothing? That idea is both intriguing (at least for me) and perplexing (also, just for me).

And I even got out and did a little grocery shopping. For food items, I think I'll be shopping at Aldi's a whole lot more, except for a few select things that they don't carry (like brown rice and the ground beef with the fat content I like. I actually prefer the 97% fat free to anything else. Makes me feel better for one, it's definitely Core for another, but I only buy it when it's nearing the expiration date. I'm picky, I know... And milk. How is it that WalMart's milk is fresher than even the local dairy's was??? ). Everything else *sigh* will come from WalMart. That's so sad, that WalMart just comes in and takes over everything. And that we let them. :-S

I also got other things done, like T's wash and stuff like that.

I'd better go, though, before I run out of energy, and I'm up too late typing or playing around on here!

Friday's Feast #18

Appetizer

What was your favorite cartoon when you were a child?

I had 2. At one point, I was really big on Garfield. But of all the ones that were on when we were kids, I'd have to say that The Smurfs were probably my most favorite! :-)

Soup

Pretend you are about to get a new pet. Which animal would you pick, and what would you name it?

We'd get a cat. I don't know what we'd name it, we'd have to talk about it first. I'd probably let the kids name it though. They are always good for an interesting name for an animal, even if it's stuffed, and if it's just based on the animal itself (like hoppy for a bunny rabbit).

Salad

On a scale of 1-10 with 10 being highest, how much do you enjoy getting all dressed up for a special occasion?

2. There's nothing really wrong with getting dressed up, but it's not my most favorite thing to do. I make sure to wear a skirt and nice shirt for church, because that's how I was brought up, but I prefer just a t-shirt and sweat pants.

Main Course

What kind of music do you listen to while you drive?

The same as I do any other time I listen to music---country.

Dessert

When was the last time you bought a clock? And in which room did you put it?

The only clock I can think of that I bought was my alarm clock. And it's in the bedroom. But the last clock bought in the house would have to be the one T bought to put up on the wall so he can open his eyes and look at it to see the time, so he doesn't have to move to see the alarm clock.

To go see other people's Friday's Feast, click here.

Think about joining in on my contest too, it closes on Wednesday, May 7th!

May 01, 2008

Thursday, easy day

Here's something mildly personal for your Thursday evening. Thanks to Sunday and yesterday, my feet are killing me. Especially my left, because one of my toes has a humongous blister on it :-( I can't walk right, and it just seems to be getting bigger all the time :-( I want to pierce it, but I know that's not a good idea so I'm just going to leave it be and pray and hope for the best.

Today was productive though. I did some work in my washroom, straightening the closet in there. And I dragged T's socks and underwear box (yes, a big box) so I can sort through them. I haven't yet, but I will. I want to get out all the socks that aren't his, because there have been a few that have made their way into the box, and I want to get rid of the ones with the holes in them. At first he didn't like the idea, because he thinks I'm attacking all his stuff first, and he's losing stuff, but when I told him why I wanted to search through the box, he was okay with it. Also, I need to figure out a new box, because the one that they're in now is nearly demolished. And we don't have any more of those not in use right now.

I'm nearly done with my idea for Mother's Day. I talked to my sponsor (hi Mary), and she answered my questions :-D

It will be just hours! I promise!

April 30, 2008

Wednesday...

Yesterday at weigh in I found I had lost 2 and a half pounds. So I guess the walking is paying off. Which is good because today I hurt! My ankle was acting up some, so I don't think that helps---I ended up walking a bit differently because of that, so I think that contributed to my lower half hurting so much.

I've got some ideas about something, but I will not let everyone know about it until I know about legalities. It's going to be something very special for Mother's Day :-D

One happy thing about today. I picked up my last paycheck from the Penny Saver. Between that and what's left in my business checking account, I have just enough to pay for one more month before I need it to pay for itself.

April 29, 2008

How I met My Honey - The story of Me and T

To put it simply....

I walked to the box.

I opened the box.

I shewed away the bees.

I looked down and said "Hello Honey"...




That will give you some idea of the humor with which T manages to touch my life every day...

Now, without delay, the story that started it all...

As soon as I saw this on Ramblings by Reba, I just had to do it. Like now. I wanted to do the (Breast)feeding and Birth Story poststravaganza hosted by Lotus over on Sarcastic Mom (they still aren't out of the question, I just have to sit down and compose the rest of them), but this one is a must. So much that I opened a new post and started it right away. Is it wrong that I *have to* with T, but that I am still putting off the ones about the kids? I'll link to those too...

So, anyhow...how many of you have wondered how T and I got together? I like the story a lot, myself.

When I was growing up, I heard my mom and dad's story countless times. They met and married in 2 months. I didn't come along until 2 years later, and I'm the oldest (there was another that mom lost, before me, but that was still more than a year after they met), so, no, it wasn't a shotgun wedding (though I don't know if my grandfather would have thought so). Mom always said she just KNEW when she first kissed him that first night that everything was different. She was 29, naive even then, and he was 25. He was a bit more worldly, a bit of a lush :-|, but his life got turned around just as much. The highlights for them---the talked every single day from the day they met. Two days after they met, my dad said "I'm falling in love with you" (I always imagine them cuddling---whether they actually were or not, I'll of course never know---but maybe she told me that once). Mom said "Fall slowly" (I'll always love that line.). 9 days after that---while mom was driving him to his parents' house, my dad said during the conversation "when we get married, blah blah blah." Mom said "we're getting married?" (or something of the sort---okay, this part is fuzzy to me, because it's not the funniest or most important part.) That was them getting engaged---she was surprised by the comment, he asked her---she tried to pull off the road to get a kiss, he thought she was so overcome that she was a bit dizzy and this pulling off the road thing wasn't intentional, and tried to steer the car back...but she let him know she just wanted a kiss. So then they got married---in June instead of August like they had originally planned. I think they figured why wait or something. Anyhow, that led to me and my sister.

As for me and T....my back story. I never had a boyfriend in high school---I don't know if you can really count the month I was "going" with the guy that I had a huge (stupid) crush on in high school, because that was more of a pity acceptance (I asked him out like a dozen times), and he broke up with me a month later. He and I tried to kiss once---in the front seat of his car up at the top of the hill mom and dad's house is at the bottom of, at night, in the moonlight---but it was a complete failure. The year and a half before I met T, I was working on getting in the military---first the Navy, then the Army, which I got into---and after I enlisted, had a small falling out with my mom, so I left for my grandparents' house on principle. While there I started going with my best guy friend, Josh, and was still dating him when I left for the Army. Marriage was discussed, we got really touchy feely (it was about time, really, there was a LOT of sexual tension those last couple years), but it wasn't meant to be.

I got through Basic after going to the Fitness Training Company for a few weeks, then I left for my AIT. Now, my original MOS was going to be Explosive Ordinance Disposal, but the guy who went to the interview with me chickened out, and since I figured if the guy could be a wimp and chicken out, then me declining (some of those pictures in the info-movie they showed us were pretty bad!) wouldn't look so bad. I remember another possibility when I enlisted, and asked about it when I had to choose my new MOS. That was Power Generator Equipment Repair.

Now, T's back story...He had a few girlfriends when he was in school, but once he got to high school, nothing serious. There was one girl, whose name we used for D's middle name, that was a friend of his. He liked her a lot. But he wasn't going to ask her out until he (a)knew how to kiss and (b)had a job that made good money. Needless to say, he never asked her out because he moved back in with his dad for his senior year, and the girl lived in the town his mom lives in. And he didn't really learn to kiss or get a good enough job before his step mom sorta helped encourage him to enlist (that's putting it lightly), so in October 1994 he went to his Basic training post. He's got double jointed shoulders (winged scapula), so he can't do push ups very well, but they pushed him right on through to AIT.

This is where the pushing stopped. He didn't make the cut with the push ups at AIT either, but they didn't let it slide this time. So, instead of getting a permanent duty assignment (well, he got one only he didn't get to go to it because he didn't pass the Physical Training Tests), he was kept there. AIT was in Aberdeen Proving Grounds, Maryland. He ended up being a holdover, meaning he was heldover after the time that his class graduated. He was being discharged because of the poor performance with the PT tests, and he did eventually get an appointment to have his shoulders looked at---but I'm getting ahead of myself.

A week after his class left, my class arrived. I was one of only two girls in my class. But I think we both could hold our own very well. We roomed togetherfor the first part of my time there. I think the guys in my class were actually pretty awesome. At least most of them were. I arrived at APG on July 14th, 1995, a Friday night. My class had to fill out some paperwork for the assignment. I think we did some of that on Saturday and there was some we finished on Monday. Some was done on Saturday in the company's main office, as I remember seeing T (very vaguely, but I know it was him) while we were working on our first round of paperwork. I know I had to have slept a lot on Saturday though because we had traveled all day Friday. I got there really really late at night---at the earliest 2am. I remember carrying my bags---and INSISTING UPON CARRYING my bags all the way from the company office to the barracks. The guy that walked me there---the soldier on CQ duty that morning (not T, though that would have been ironic now that I think of it) offered, but I wanted to show that I was a big tough girl. By the time we got to the edge of the parking lot across from the barracks, I decided to drag my garmet bag. But I had that duffel bag (the government issued one) and the one I had bought at the PX for all of my other stuff on my back.

There was also a period of filling out paperwork in the post's/brigade's rec hall. I remember that specifically because I know it was the day that I told my roommate that I had a really bad feeling about the platoon's drill sergant---a black guy that really wasn't a nice guy, and actually got deeply involved in some shinanghans going on around APG---only to turn and see him in the doorway of the room we were doing the paperwork in! I think it's important in regards to my relationship with T because I think overhearing that gave him a reason to have it out for me.

That Sunday, just 2 days after I got there (July 16th to be exact), was the first day I met T face to face. At the end of formation that Sunday evening, he came up to me. His first words to me were "Hi, you know you can wear your civilian glasses now." At that point I was of course wearing the government issued glasses---sometimes referred to as BCGs (Birth Control Glasses) or RCGs (Rape Control Glasses). From then on, it was a bit of a whirlwind. At first we were just friendly---everyone knew he had a thing for me. You could just tell. That Tuesday he asked me to go to lunch with him. Soon after was our first kiss---right where we could have been caught, and near to a spot that we'd often go later. It's amazing we never got caught there. He denies it, but I swear to you the first thing he said was "that's the first time I've ever been kissed by a real woman." I think we even had a lookout---there were a few people I know were against our relationship---not just the fraternization part, more than that I'm sure---but there were some people (even a former drill sergant---not our drill though) who were totally for us! I look back on it now and wonder---how come my roommate never diswaided me from this relationship? But then, I have to note she did something of a mock marriage ceremony for us. I wonder where she is---I don't even remember her name right now!!!

If you were wondering about my relationship with Josh back then---I broke up with him just before T and I officially decided to start seeing each other. It wasn't easy---he took it hard, but then there were a lot of things he was going through as well. He was going to college, and he had a chemical imbalance. He ended up meeting a woman online and marrying her---they were together for a few years before he found out she was cheating on him. He's since moved on (though I don't know if he's divorced his first wife yet, or if his new lady has divorced her husband finally), and he's with a woman he's very happy with.

Within a week of meeting T, we had fallen for each other. We started talking about sneaking away to have sex. I was a virgin. Needless to say, 2 months after my 19th birthday I no longer was.

In August we got engaged. Mid-September we made D. November we got married. There's really very little to describe in the midst there---there was sex, talking---lots and LOTS of talking, since we couldn't do much more unless we stole away. Of course, there was a lot of that too. In December we were both discharged---between my pregnancy and everything else, I ended up not being able to pass my PT tests, so I became a holdover too.

Our wedding was a super SIMPLE one. I look at Bridezillas and think --- those chics are just CRAZY. The guest list, the dress, the food, the music---none of it matters. All I wanted, all I've ever wanted, for both my wedding and my vow renewal, which we did back in 2005, is the man I married, and a few close friends and family. I wasn't able to have my parents there when I got married, but my dad was able to walk me down the "aisle" when we renewed our vows. I HAD to have it, especially that time, because my sister got married just 3 short weeks later. And I didn't want HER to have that before I did! :-| I'm the oldest after all, and I did get married first! For my wedding, we had all of 9 people there---the wedding party (me, T, my maid of honor, our best man and the post chaplain, as we got married on post) and 4 guests (10 if you count the baby in my belly. I just thought of that...I guess it's 10 now, since I have to count her at the renewal!). When we renewed our vows, there were 10 people---me, T, D, P, my dad, my sister, her husband, the pastor (at that time) of my home church, and my best friends from college, Christy and Nancy.

Something ironic---if they had discharged him in the time they are supposed to (2 weeks), then we wouldn't have been able to grow our relationship. We were together there at AIT for 5 months---he would have been gone after a week.

Things we also find interesting---he wanted to go EOD. He just barely had the scores for it. There are other things. Which is why our song is "Keeper of the Stars"---someone had to have a hand in it to get us together.

And from all this has come 2 beautiful babies, and a very strong 12 1/2 year marriage. I would never give back any of the trouble I got into if it meant losing all that I have now. It's not perfect by a long shot, but the 3 people it gave me are priceless. I'm still crazy for T (most of the time), and I look forward to the many happy years we talked about having together back 13 years ago. I find it a bit ironic that 13 years ago TODAY I didn't even know the guy---but by the end of the year I had met him and fallen in love with him and married him. I'd love to have had my parents at the wedding, but it was impossible for them to get out there at that time. At least I had dad at the renewal.

My birth stories: Or - More things than you really wanted to know about my reproductive health/history Part 2

Last time, when I wrote about having D, I ended talking about trials to come when it comes to the birth control I took after having her. I'm not going to regale you with the full 8 years worth, but taking that shot started me on an oddessy I'd much sooner forget now. And I'd really rather have all it's effects erased from my life as well.

When I was considering our birth control choices, I didn't see many options. I didn't find myself very good at taking medication, as there were lots of times I had forgotten some---chief among them, having just come off of a pregnancy, my prenatal vitamins. I had tried to breastfeed D, but after a short time (which I will elaborate on when I discuss my breastfeeding story), that came to an end. So, my few options seemed to be (a) winging it, and if I got pregnant again I did (which T would have preferred---I think he would have tried awfully hard to get me pregnant again quick so our kids could be just as close together as he and his brothers are), but that was out because after the ordeal I had to go through with having D---the sudden onset of labor (not really, because I just don't think I knew the signs. Not that there was a lot of obvious pain, just a tremendous amount of discomfort the day before), the tearing, the hematoma and resulting effects---(b) use condoms and hope we didn't get pregnant (why use condoms? We are a monogamous married couple.), (c) do the cross your fingers and hope thing, with some removal, (d) get something implanted or (e) get the shot. Well, the shot's every 3 months, there's little to no period, the nurse assured me (after repeated asking) that I'd be fine with little to no side effects, so I started on that.

Frankly, the nurse off, way off. Perhaps the 2 biggest effects right off were fatigue and an immense appetite. I always could eat a lot---but that can't be all of the reason for the weight I gained. I was making an attempt each day to do some exercise---walking with T to work, I was even still a member at the health club I went to before I joined the Army, which our first apartment happened to be across from. I'd go to aerobics classes, yoga, tai chi. Like I said, I did a lot of walking, with T, on my own, to the playground not to far from our house so D could play when she got older, pulling a wagon full of clothes up to the laundromat up the street from us. I might not have been a fanatic about it, but geesh! And my mom swears that in the time after I started taking Depo Provera and the year I took it, I ballooned. And you really can't say I never got my butt out and did stuff, because I HAD to walk to get where I was going most of the time---we didn't have a car, and the only time I really used my parents' car was to get to the doctor, either the gynecologist or D's pediatrician 30 miles away (the same city I had her in).

It didn't do the greatest for my head either. It's not documented since I wasn't going to any doctor other than the gynecologist---we didn't have insurance, and I was paying out of pocket for the shots---but I'm sure I suffered from some sort of depression at the time. I know my self esteem was in the gutter some---I can specifically remember one time T was trying to get frisky, and I went to wave my hand to get him off, and I popped him right in the nose. He got a nose bleed---but to feel so bad to discourage attention from your hubby, and then be insistent enough to end up batting him hard enough in the nose to make him bleed? Please people, I had to be depressed!

And the tricks not having your period plays on your mind! Not just during the 12 months I was on the thing, but for the majority of the next 8 years! I had started to wonder if I was EVER going to be able to have another kid. I guess the withdrawal method just works that good for us :-S But, I never had a period. Starting about 2003, after I went to Weight Watchers the first time, I sorta had one. Here and there, so much so I really got to calling it a "when it wants to" not a "monthly." Because it was NOT coming every month. For a few years before my first Weight Watchers attempt, it wasn't even coming once a year! I wondered if I had Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. I got tested for that once T got in the union and we had insurance. The numbers came back normal. I don't have a thyroid problem, those always come back normal. No blood sugar imbalance---even with a family history of diabetes (my YOUNGER sister already has it for heaven's sakes!), my blood sugar comes back normal every time. My cholesterol even! I'm just fat. Because of that damn shot!

I can't really tell you how bad I felt during that time. I've got journals, but frankly they're in our storage upstairs and I'd really rather not revisit that time that indepth. It was crazy. I know there were times I FELT CRAZY. And even with my questions and having to go through what I had to to have D, there were times even just after I quit the Depo that I would go through babylust---wanting another baby so bad I could taste it!

Like I said, I didn't know if I could have another kid because of how spotty if at all my system was working. T and I discussed it, and I decided that we could start trying for another when I was 6 months away from graduating college. I figured, it would probably take FOREVER if at all for anything to happen. I figured, I was probably infertile at this point---I mean, you have to ovulate and bleed pretty frequently to be fertile, right? Those are the SIGNS, right?

But the gods were smiling down on us. Things were in store for me that I'd doubted could ever be. Boy, did I get a surprise.

TO BE CONTINUED...

April 27, 2008

Walk with me....

This may end up being a bit redundant, as it IS on my sidebar, but I'm walking with March of Dimes, now March for Babies, this weekend. If you'd like to sponsor me, please click the sponsor me button either on this badge:



Or on the one on the badge to the right! I'm excited about this, as this will be the first time I will be participating in a fund-raising activity! Your donation will be GREATLY appreciated!!! I know it looks like a small goal, but every little bit helps!!! I think that this is part of why it is that we've been walking as much as we have! That way I'll be better able to handle the walk!

Have a nice day!

Such a nice weekend.

Even though it rained yesterday, this weekend has been pretty good. I've gotten in a walk both days, and didn't do too bad on my Points either day either. I still feel like a bit of an outcast with the MOPS group but that's just fine. I'm not going to mind too bad. I have my own life besides just that. Anyhow, that's the group I walked with, is my MOPS group. We raised $1000 altogether, with one of the mothers raising $400 by herself! I'm hoping for more donations next time---because we kinda decided this will be our cause, and I suggested we find a time before next year's walk to have the kids help us decorate t-shirts, because I think it would be great to have team shirts, with the reason we're there in the first place helping us decorate them.

Now I have to deal with one of D's really good friends being at the house until about 6pm because she's going to youth group with D. That's one thing I missed today---going to church, because of doing the walk instead.

With yesterday's rain storm, it was actually interesting. I knew from watching the news and keeping an eye on weather reports here and there, like on the comptuer here, that it was supposed to be rainy yesterday afternoon, so I knew I had to get going and take a walk before it did. Also, I wanted to walk earlier in the day than usual so I could sorta get used to an earlier time for htis morning. Didn't get out as early as I wanted yesterday, but in enough time that I was well enough ahead of the storm that I wasn't caught in it for long! I was crossing one of the streets that is on what used to be my Penny Saver route when I met up with the wall of weather...I swear it was like running into a wall or jumping into water...it went from fairly warm to cold so fast! Just a step! That was wild. Then I was about 5 or 6 doors down from our house when the rain started. Nice big cold rain drops. But it felt good!

Well, I'd like to do a few things around the house so I'd better get going while I still have a boat load of energy. Also, P wants to go outside and play with his bubbles! So have a good weekend!!! :-D

April 25, 2008

Friday's Feast #17

Appetizer

Name something you would categorize as weird.

Besides the question? Conservatives. But that's kinda hypocritical, because I'm conservative in many areas of my own life. But my views are very liberal. So I guess the one thing I would categorize most as weird is myself. And the desire humans possess to find weirdness or abnormalcy in others. :-|

Soup

What color was the last piece of food you ate?

White. I had microwaved 94% fat free Act II popcorn.

Salad

On a scale of 1-10 with 10 being highest, how much do you enjoy being alone?

Somewhere between a 3 and a 5. Which is good, because there's always someone around. Usually they are small and cute, but sometimes they are big and good looking. Ask me when I've had a long day with one of the kids though. It WILL be a 1.

Main Course

Fill in the blank: I will cast a vote for a history making candidate in 2008.

Dessert

Describe your sleeping habits.

I think this is a bit personal.

I go in my bedroom, cover myself up, and go to sleep. I sleep on a mattress that's on the box spring, on the floor. It's easier to co-sleep that way. I don't have to worry about the little guy falling so far. He doesn't do it often. That's about it---I sleep at night (my husband usually sleeps during the day as he works at night), and I try to go to bed around 11pm. Which means I need to go soon.

Fantastic Friday

No, really, it is! I hope you blog hoppers are having a pretty good Friday evening too!!! :-) It feels so good to realize, I DON'T have to pick up Penny Savers this evening, and I DON'T have to fold/stuff 200+, and I DON'T have to walk from house to house around my neighborhood delivering them! They are other people's livelihoods, I understand that---but they're not mine!!! Not anymore! And it wasn't really doing much---I really have to let go and let God with the Candle Biz. I'm not moving AT ALL on that, I really should get in on phone calls, etc. :-| I'm coming to realize the weight loss is what is going to build up my confidence for approaching people to talk to them about the candles! And of course it's got great health benefits too! The weight loss---earning money from the candle biz, if our income were to come from just that, we'd have to find or be our own HMO.

I'm happy about our current bid to get healthier. We haven't gone to the track for about 2 days, but that doesn't mean I haven't tried to find a way to keep moving! Today I told T to drop me off at this one Estate Sale, and to go pick up D---it was down one of the streets we walk when we go over to the track at the college---and that I'd start walking back home if he didn't show up before I was done. Well, he didn't, so off I went when I was done. I wasn't able to find anything he'd really like---small, odd electronics, metal bowls with rings on the side (I think the rings are for hooking the bowls to electric mixers)---but I was able to find 4 books by Debbie McComber, who wrote A Good Yarn, a book I really liked centered around a yarn shop. I didn't find anymore in that series, but the ones I did find look good :-). I've got so many books to read, and so little time to read them in! I also found a bit of knitting related items, including a "How to Knit" book that I'm going to be giving to a nurse where my mom is, who she taught to knit and who I've been helping with some crocheting terms/techniques/etc.

But I wasn't planning on telling you about the yard sale finds yet. No, I was going to tell you---I met T at the corner on that street, where we usually turn. I was coming the opposite way from where we come. I had really hoped I'd get to walk further, but I didn't. There was another bit---oh yes, down the driveway/street of the trailer park. And then a bit of what used to be my route. It felt good not to have to think "I've got to drop a Penny Saver here, but not here, and I've got to put them here and here and here." It felt great to just be walking for the plain joy of walking! :-D

Well, I've got dinner to go eat, I will be blog hopping myself later!!! :-D

April 23, 2008

I'll definitely be continuing my birth stories, but it's time to just talk about today.

It's nice to know I have at least one regular reader out there (you know who you are :-) This relationship sorta reminds me of the one pen pal I kept who was a prisoner. In other words, you remind me of him---with your big brotherly advice, etc. He's out now, and still in contact with my family. That's right, my WHOLE family. We really created a bond. And he's happily married too :-)).

You know what sorta sucks though? T and I finally started "getting along" (it's not been bad---we don't bicker and fight, but it's been unsettling sometimes with him lately) just before he went to work! I don't know what it is, but he's been sorta gruff these last two days. Maybe it's because I haven't been waking him up? (Okay, you'd only really understand that if you went to work with him...) I think it has something to do with the exercise, but maybe not really...he's on something of a health kick all of a sudden. Maybe I'm just really sensitive, because the hugs and kisses are still relatively easy to get. I'm not super worried---we've got a good, solid marriage, I know I have little to worried about. :-) It just sucks is all.

So, otherwise, I'm really happy with all I've accomplished today. I made 2 important phone calls---one to Enterprise, to inquire instead with a higher level of employee on the charge that hit my checking account 2 weeks after we returned the rental. I have no idea why it did that, because (a) I canceled the insurance through Enterprise the very next day and (b) the lady at the rental office told me that we'd have nothing to worry about, because I canceled the insurance within 24 hours. The guy I ended up talking to was really nice, said that my story made sense, and that he usually sides with the customer. He sounded a bit surprised to find out I still had my copy of the contract with the notation that we had canceled. But he said that the other guy couldn't do the charge back because he wasn't a manager (there's only one guy in the office I guess), but that it should take a week to 10 days. I look forward to it, because this is actually part of the amount that I can't figure out, but the bank said we had more than my checkbook did. I'm not sure what that's all about :-|

The other phone call was to the mom in my MOPS group who is organizing our team for the March for Babies on Sunday. I don't like that it's so close to the day of the walk, but that's why I have such a small goal---I know I won't be able to ask many people to be my sponsors, and I'd rather the ones who do give a lump sum---even a small one, say $5. I'm going to talk to my mom and dad and ask them to be a sponsor, then I don't know, maybe a neighbor and some of T's coworkers. I'm considering putting a bit in myself.

Also, I did some laundry, some dishes, the floor looks halfway decent...I'm not sure what's up with the vacuum, because it still seems to be clogged. Not as bad, since I forced out the clog, but still clogged. My dishes are nearly done, I've got a sink full right now, then I'll get ready for bed. :-) Feels nice, all this exercising and the results from it.

Take care, and see you all (all 1 of you) later! :-)

April 22, 2008

My birth stories: Or - More things than you really wanted to know about my reproductive health/history Part 1

Well, as you will find out by reading my How I Met My Honey post, I was a mama for the first time really young (19). Since the day I started having my period, I was like clockwork---every 29 days.

About 2 weeks after T and I got engaged, we snuck off post and had a rather interesting intoxicated (yes, I was 19, I only really had a buzz---dude, don't tell my mom, she doesn't know all this, okay? T was SLOSHED) liason at a friend's daughter's apartment. It was just me and him in the bedroom, I know that for sure. Heh...anyhow...I think back to that time now, and wonder how some things got so crazy. There are a lot of things I don't even think about now. This is probably the hardest I've thought about that night in a long time.

So, anyhow, because I was so regular, I actually knew going into that weekend that I was ovulating. I just didn't tell T until after we had our fun (and, frankly, got in trouble for it too! #2 of my Article 15s. Because of sneaking away, not because of getting pregnant). That was the weekend of September 15 & 16th, 1995.

2 weeks later, I took a HPT, and sure enough...I made a sick call appointment, and told my mom by phone on October 3rd, while she was watching the verdict to the OJ Simpson trial (no kidding), that I thought I might be pregnant. She remembers it vividly, in part because she remembers not being able to catch the verdict while I was telling her. She suddenly had much more important things on her mind.

When I told T he was definitely going to be a daddy, you couldn't keep the smile off his face! Our drill sergant (you need to read my post on how I met T to understand that jerk some) told me once if T didn't live up to his responsibility as a daddy, to really let him have it. I knew deep in my heart that T was going to be a great daddy, and I knew that he was going to prove that drunken-fraternizing-jackbutt wrong! And he has :-D

A month and a half later, T and I were married. It was a VERY small ceremony---there were 9 people there TOTAL, and that included everyone in the wedding party. No big deal---later, in 2005 when we renewed our vows, there was actually just one more person attending. Then, another month later, we were discharged. I came here, to live with my parents because it was my Home of Record, and he went out to Colorado for the same reason, so he could try to find a job and make a home for us. He didn't keep any one job for long---he got one of the worst jobs for him, telemarketing---he's not a big talker on the phone unless he really knows you. Like his mom or his friends or me.

He wasn't able to find much of anything so on April 1st, 1996, my mom told him that if he doesn't find a job by the end of the month, he can come out here. You thought that she was going to have us divorce or something, didn't ya? No, that was his mom's suggestion a month later---I don't think she remembers, but my mom will never forget it. Mid May, he came out here on a Greyhound bus, we met him at the old terminal in Erie, PA.

From then until the day before I had D, he looked for jobs, going with my dad to just about every place he could, putting applications in. He ended up getting the job he's got now---he went in for orientation the day before I had D, and was to start that next morning.

I was determined to go without any meds or anything when I had our son---we were thinking that, because most of the men in his family had made only or mainly boys, our kids were going to all be boys. We only had a boy's name picked out, though we went over girl's names too.

The morning of June 11th, 1996---my mom's 51st birthday---at 2:30am, I felt a pain I hadn't felt for 9 months up until then. I got up and said something to my mom about it (we were living with them still, and the bedrooms were right next to each other). She said to walk around a bit, and see if it made it any better. I was actually 5 days overdue at this point, so I was happy at the idea I might finally be getting done with this. I walked around a little up on the landing, and it felt a bit better, but 45 minutes later I started hurting again. And from then until 6:36am, just 4 hours after I felt the first real pain of my labor, it didn't stop. My contractions were so close together, we couldn't time them. I was in agony. There are pictures. And it didn't stop there---my parents' house was 20+ miles away from the hospital I had decided I'd have this baby at---the one that I was born in, as well as my mom and my sister. Once it was determined that we should rush to the hospital---by my mom calling the doc and telling them that they were so close together we couldn't time them---off we went. Gees, it's a good thing gas didn't cost an arm and a leg, because after he dropped us off, dad headed back to get my sister. Dad had to take the BUMPIEST route to the hospital---down a street that had lots of factories, so lots of railroad tracks :-( I just recently told him, in the last few years probably while we were driving out to see my mom while she was still down in Ohio, that I could have killed him that night.

When I was examined, it turns out I was 9 cm. When my mom found that out, she was surprised because she realized I could have had D in the car. We got to the hospital at 4 something. Mom waited out in the lobby because she didn't want to see me going through all that pain, so it was me and T and the docs coming in and out. I was wreathing in pain, it was so bad. It turns out there was some lady who had lost a multiple pregnancy, and the nurses asked T to tell me to quiet down. It wasn't easy, but I did some. But man was I in pain. I wanted drugs then---but I couldn't have them because I was so far along. The only thing that made me feel better was him stroking my sternum, and focusing on a specific spot on his tshirt. He was wearing a band shirt for Metallica, for their song "Unforgiven." I focused on the stamp the character on the shirt was holding in his right hand.

Finally it came time to push---my body told me it was time. The doc wanted me to slow down a bit, but I ended up just pushing thru---and ended up tearing some because her head didn't quite go through the birth canal as it was supposed to. That got sewn up, but it wasn't the end of my troubles---they had just begun.

I said before that with D, we had only picked out a boy's name, but we had kicked around girl's names. Imagine our surprise when the doc took her out and put her on my belly, and we discovered "he" was a "she". We sorta looked at each other and (unlike my mom's exaggeration, where we didn't know what to do), conferred with each other, using names we had talked about and liked---a name I liked that I had picked out when I was 14 and had a friend who said she was pregnant, but only the first name and not the whole name I had back then (it was 4 names long, but the reasoning still holds true), and the name of the girl he had liked in his junior year, who was his friend but that he had never asked out (again, something you'll have to read Our Story to understand). So she became DD. :-D

I went to recovery, and then to my room. I breastfed D some, off and on---there are pictures of me doing so. I didn't take her to breast as fast as I did P, but at the hospital I had P, they had a practice of leaving the baby with the mom and dad for an hour, for bonding purposes. But I still tried.

By 8am, 9, I had started to have some real discomfort, and when I felt down there :-S, I could tell something was wrong. A nurse brought her to my room, but I felt so bad and also was so worried about what was going on, that I couldn't do anything with my baby, I didn't even want to touch her :-( I told the nurse something was wrong, and she checked. I had a hematoma---a collection of blood, in the area of the tear. I was rushed to an operating room, and it was drained and taken care of. I wasn't given blood, though the doc later told my mom that he had thought about it.

Other than that, the next 2 days of my stay were relatively uneventful. I have fond memories of holding her and singing to her. I just couldn't keep my hands off my baby. I also seem remember being able to room in with her, but I could be mistaken. The only thing is I had no bowel movements before I left---something rather extraordinary. I've ALWAYS been regular with that, but I guess the prevalance of people not being so regular (like, everyday, at least once a day) isn't the "norm" any more. So even without the bm, they let me go. Which wasn't a good thing.

2 days after I left the hospital, I was back in the emergency room. With a clogged bit of plumbing (I'm trying to put it nicely for you). And an infection. During this 2 day stay is when the doc told my mom that he had thought about the blood transfusion during the draining, but had decided against it. That pissed her off. Why we didn't decide to stop going there right then and there is beyond me, because we were both going to that office then. It might be because the doc that had delivered me when I was born was the other doc in the office. Either way, things didn't get better. Oh, everything was basically okay with me after coming home after getting all those strong antibiotics for the infection---it burned some, and they were so strong I couldn't even pump for D. :-( My mom had to give her formula, which it's great there was a larger sample can in the stuff that came home with us.

No, there's another issue I have with the office, that has little to do with my first pregnancy. In fact, it's in the prevention of another. I didn't want to take pills, because at that time I believed that I was so bad about it I'd probably forget and get pregnant again. The first time was such hell that I didn't want to relive it any time soon. So I did a little (and I do mean LITTLE---we didn't have the internet as prevalently back then) research, and decided that Depo Provera would be my best bet. No way....

To Be Continued

April 21, 2008

Accomplishing things feels good.

Today wasn't as productive as it could have been, but it was pretty good. Another day spent with family, and another day walking my butt off!!! I swear I've walked more in the last 3 or 4 days than I have in months!!! Even before my ankle sprain and even with the Penny Saver route. Really. Because I started to depend on that, and now I want to get out and move as often and as much as I can. But I really think that icing my ankle tonight will be a good idea. I've talked to T off and on, before I went to the doc last week and also this evening, plus a few other times. And it seems there's a fitness revolution going on in his head too. I don't know why, because despite that little pot belly that I really do love on him, he's really quite fit. Maybe he's come to depend on the 8 hours he's on his feet all day, like I did with my route. I don't know. But we ended up walking what must have been 5 miles this evening!!! Me and T mainly---P was in my absolutely most favorite piece of baby tech ever (his stroller), and D was riding her bike. T even did a little running, which I thought was JUST CUTE. Speaking of just cute---P did a little running too. He must have been listening to his daddy when he said he was going to run some, or maybe he was watching daddy a bit too. One day mommy's going to take off running as well. But, we walked 2 miles from home here to the college, then what must be a mile around the track at the college, and then 2 more miles back home. There's a much closer track, but I really don't want to walk on that track (it's on our way to the other track). Besides, the trek just to get to the college is a hefty one. Now maybe I can think about going to the church across from the college, next to where I lived when my family first moved to town, for Weight Watchers, because the walk really isn't nearly as bad as I thought it was once. My ankle might hurt some tomorrow, but then again I think it's thanking me some. I know the rest of me is. I even broke a sweat! T was complaining some about how slow I was, but I have to get back up to my pace, he really has to give me some time. I tried hard, and got up next to him a few times, and I really booked it up one incline (there's 2 inclines on our route---this is the "middle" one, the steepest and longest of the 3). THAT felt good, even though I think I'm not a big fan of my pulse rate going up. There were a few times, when T wasn't being crabby about my pace, that he would walk ahead of me, then walk back. Well, he couldn't help walking ahead of me, because he moves a bit faster, but I just got such a kick out of him walking back, and I thought it was actually kinda cool because he ends up getting some EXTRA walking out of it. He doesn't stop for me---he keeps walking, just comes back to where I am. I want to be able to make Weight Watchers tomorrow evening, but I hope to walk like that in one form or another again tomorrow, and as much as we can this week. There's a bit of a chance of rain on Wednesday, but I hope we can work something out. Maybe then we can go to the closer track (so we don't have to go as far when it starts) and just walk for a while. Maybe, I'll talk to T about it. I don't know if I can express to him just how much I really did enjoy it. It's not that I don't like exercising---it's just that I like sitting and crocheting or knitting a lot too, and that some things went haywire at one point, and I got fat. :-( But if it doesn't register that I lost a bunch tomorrow, I'm not going to be happy!!!

On the situation with the neighbors---well, we weren't home a whole bunch today, so D didn't get a chance to play with the girls. Not that I want her to. I told her she couldn't anymore, maybe I'll adjust that. Because sometimes D's mouth can get her in trouble, T says to leave it alone. That it's between her and the girls. What I don't like is that the girls' family put themselves into it. I can only say something if I'm there to witness the whole thing. I don't like that they put their foot in it, but I guess they were there and I wasn't. I don't like it that someone has attacked my child, though, because whether she was rude or not, she's able to have the friends she wants, and spend time with other friends while another of her friends are there. I'm the only one allowed to tell her who she can and can't hang out with. I'd still like to ask that crazy b***h next door just exactly how she would feel if the shoe was on the other foot!!! I hate to say it though---I really question her sanity, among other things---both parents currently are not in the best of health, but I've heard many problems over there even before all this.

In order to deal with all this, however, I've made a decision that it seems I have to keep making. I'm going to turn it all over to God. I'm going to start by reading (which I've already started) Power of a Praying Parent by Stormie Omartian. I've also got Power of a Praying Wife, which I will also start working on soon. I actually like this one so far. It flows well. And I'm only on the very first part. In order to get myself in the mood (do I need to be in the mood to talk to God?), I'm listening to my very favorite "gospel" CD---Songs 4 Worship Country. Because I'm a country girl at heart, and I LOVE country music. That's the station our car radio is trained on. :-)

Okay, now I have to get to reading a bit of that, then a shower, then bed. Hopefully by 12:30. :-|

April 19, 2008

Happy Saturday!

It is definitely one for me. Except for just a few minutes, I've had a pretty good day today :-) My family and I ended up spending gobs of time together, I avoided a serious sunburn in the meantime, I'm good and tired and I even got a nice amount of exercise in.

D had an outing for her Girl Scout group---they planted trees as a service project. She was gone from about 8:30 to after noon. They were supposed to plant the trees at the primary school here in town, but ended up planting them several other places. Thinking my daughter would be at the primary school, which is less than a half a mile from my house, and since I need to get my butt up and groovin' if I want to start losing weight again, T, P and I walked down to the primary school. On top of big sister supposedly planting trees there, there are 2 playgrounds for P to play on. And he LOVES to play on the smaller one---which has equipment much closer to his developmental level than the bigger one---he goes up and down pretty well, and even went about getting to the highest slide on his own. Which he does pretty well---he's really very careful, but mommy of course still tries to be as close to him as possible, still advises him to be careful, and still worries when he gets close to edges, etc. But I'm proud of him because he does pretty well and he loves it so much. Anyhow, we didn't find out that her group didn't get assigned the primary school like they had thought until her troop leader showed up to tell us the girls were almost done, and they'd be coming back over to the school soon. We of course weren't the only parents there---the neighbor whose girls are also in the troop (they will be appearing later in the post due to something from last night that bled over into this evening), and a father of one or two other girls in the troop were also there.

After we got D, we went to "A Taste of" downtown, which is also connected to the college's Earth Week celebrations. A big name is coming to campus this week, to talk. It almost makes me feel bad that I'm no longer going to college, as there are lower priced tickets. But I wouldn't be able to go anyhow, so I'm not having a big fit about it. We ended up over at the grange for a while, doing this and that, eating some of the free food, listening to people, etc. Kept me from getting a sunburn at least, so that's a good thing.

Then we came home, and the part about the neighbors and something from yesterday bleeding in...well, the grandmother of the girls came along to their little field trip last night---they toured McDonald's, and a local chocolate store (a really good, high quality store), and then the older girls did some research at the college library. Well, I guess the neighbor girls wanted D to ride with them, but D wanted to ride with some of her friends from the troop, and the grandmother didn't like it, after the 3 of them did a little arguing, and said something to the mother. I guess D had said that her friends got to see her only once a week, but the neighbor girls she can see every day.

The thing of it is, the mother made a comment to D, when she came over to see the girls, asking where they were, according to D the mother said "oh, the girls you see too much of?" This is something of an on going thing with this house and us, in that the mother has a fit whenever, for whatever reason, D ends up playing with another girl in the neighborhood or just in general, more than her girls. Usually it's simply because the girls are not allowed out for a period of time, or D herself has been on restriction. Or the family has had a period of time where they were off doing things, or we had a period of time where we were off doing things---obligations for other organizations or activities, or lots of time at my mom's, or sicknesses, time together a lot with the family, what have you. Back when we were first here, to keep the peace, I went along and made sure that D played with the older girl most of the time. The problem is, in part, D is the older of the 3---their oldest is 2 years younger than D, and their other girl is 3 more younger than that. So, we have a wide range of ages involved (there are no other girls the younger girl's age in this immediate area, and there have never been), plus the younger girl is DEFINITELY spoiled.

My problem now, and what I plan to express to the mother should (when) this come(s) up again, is that if I were to tell her daughters she was only allowed to play with my daughter or have any real problem with her daughters playing with other kids (which I don't---right in front of D or not), then SHE would raise all high holy hell. I, however, know and understand that (a) the 3 girls have other friends and (b) there is NOTHING WRONG with them having other friends that they also spend time with. I will be trying my hardest to (taking a page from the series of sermons [? not sure if it's right to call them that at this church, but I guess that's probably the most appropriate word for them] that the pastors have been doing on conflict) bring a bucket of water to the matter and not a bucket of gasoline, while also confronting the truth with some grace, (a grace sandwich---compliment/grateful, grace-full comments sandwiching some truth), and not avoiding the subject. I wish I knew where all my notes are from the sermons, as I'm pulling a lot of this out of my head, and I'd really like to work from exactly what the sermons said. But I think I have the general gist of the last 3 or 4 sermons, hitting the high points. I'm also making sure to deal with the log in my eye before I confront this speck (seriously, though, I would think that the log is in her eye and the speck---doesn't exist in mine, because I don't EXPECT other kids to play with only mine, I know that everyone has more than one friend, I learned that when I was the age of the youngest of the girls) in her eye.

Tell me, after all this long explanation, if you've stayed this far, what do you think? Am I right to be upset about this? Is she being, as I feel, two faced and hypocritical about it---thinking others should do one thing while allowing her kids and herself doing another? Do you think I'm accurate in my assessment? Could there be something I'm missing?

Right now, these people and this situation is one of the things on my list of why I want to get out of here. They have been for a while---not just because of this, but also because of having to listen to that woman yell at her kids, and HOW she yells at her kids---including her form of dealing with putting her kids to bed being (1) keeping them up late, then (2) yelling at them when they (inevitably) wake up again in the middle of that night. I've had to deal with that since the younger girl was the age of their son---who is 9 months younger than P, as they conceived their son (I really didn't want to know this) on the day I was in the hospital having P. Even before that, as she was 6 months old when we moved in, and it started that very summer (we moved in here in June). And the apple doesn't fall far from the tree---the grandmother yells at all of them, from the mother and father right down to the littlest one, just as much if not more. I can't WAIT to get away from these people and be able to ignore them when I see them! Because I will. Good thing D should be going up to Cadets soon, so that then she won't have to be in the same BUILDING with the youngest, or the same troop and level as the oldest of those two girls.

I also want to get out of here, though, because I'm sick of this house, I can't stand the landlord and his lax ways, I want someplace I can use for a home party that I'm not totally embarrassed to bring people into, someplace where I can put things where they belong (you know, like tires in a garage, snow things in a garage, dirt in a garage---potting soil---P in his own room, etc etc.), I'm sick of jumping each time I hear a car come down the driveway when T's running late, wondering if it's him, I'm sick of listening to neighbor's---the people upstairs, the ones I spoke of before, ANYONE who lives in this godforesaken trailer park---business! And I want my own place. Why I haven't called anymore numbers (though I have been collecting them), I don't know. I even saw a nice little house with a for rent sign out front. But the last 2 times I got the number of a for rent sign, look where we ended up---with a landlord who was a dead beat---and a dead beat for a landlord.

So, enough negativity! I'm so happy I'm done with the Penny Saver route. No pressure! I was able to enjoy myself! Now I just have to find other outlets to plug/sell/promote my candle biz!

I'm trying to figure out how to change the look of my blog. I'm sick of the all white, and I seriously wonder if the color and organization are scaring people off. I try to be jovial, but it doesn't always work. I seem to be scaring a lot of people off, I can't get people to be interested in talking to me for long very often. If at all. No one wanted to sit with me at the last MOPS meeting, which I found really odd.

April 18, 2008

Friday's Feast #16

Appetizer

Name a color you find soothing.

Black. Think sleep.

Soup

Using 20 or less words, describe your first driving experience.

Everything after nearly taking out the tree in my parents' front yard backing out is cream-puff.

Salad

What material is your favorite item of clothing made out of?

Sweatshirt material. I look forward to the day that it's denim, or silk (ha ha, not with our budget) or cotton.

Main Course

Who is a great singer or musician who, if they were to come to your town for a concert, you would spend the night outside waiting for tickets to see?

Oh my. This one is hard. If you had asked me 10 years ago, it would have been Meat Loaf. 15, Garth Brooks. I've already heard him in concert, and heard the song live, but---I think the only one I'd love to hear, and that I MIGHT chance waiting outside overnight for would be Tracy Byrd, because he sings our song "Keeper of the Stars." Otherwise, I'm not THAT into music right now.

Dessert

What is the most frequent letter of the alphabet in your whole name (first, middle, maiden, last, etc.)?

If you are counting my first, middle, maiden and married last names, it's a tie between N and A. There's one of each in my first name, 2 N's and an A in my middle (duh, that one you can almost get on your own), an A in my maiden name, and one of each in my last. :-)

To see other participants, go here.

April 17, 2008

Thursday Thirteen - 13 things I've done this week, that make me proud!


Thirteen Things I did this week, that make me proud!



Things are coming back. So I've got some things to be thankful for. Here's a list of things I've actually accomplished. They might seem small to you, but right now, being half asleep, they seem big to me!

1. Folded towels.

2. Washed all the dirty clothes in the house (almost---T's are left).

3. Kept the bathroom floor clear.

4. Gone to bed before 12am.

5. Washed nearly all of the dishes that were backlogged.

6. Gave the Circulation Manager at the Penny Saver an updated listing of what goes where, who does and doesn't want a paper, and what houses not to deliver to because they are vacant. He was really happy, thanked me several times. I mean, really, how many people do that? Not many. Too bad, I can't leave someone else with a loose end, not really knowing more about the route, ya know? They don't have anyone yet---and I'm NOT going back---even if they were to beg!

7. As a family, we've kept the car clean!

8. Paid 2 big bills today - cable and gas.

9. Vacuumed the floor. I still have to figure out what and where the clog is in the hose :-(

10. Collected a lot of garbage.

11. Made several dozen cookies, including some for the outreach that church is doing to a nearby prison. (I've got to start praying for just that soon!)

12. Made dinner just about every night. I know it should be done this way anyhow, but with how I've been feeling as of late---this is a good thing! Tonight is 15 bean soup with the recipe off of the back of the bag.

13. Got the car in to have the relay switch for the turning signal replaced. The only thing it really did was keep clicking for a bit after the signal was turned off, I hope it didn't effect the effectiveness of the turning signal itself. Now there's peace and quiet after we turn a corner.



Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!


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April 16, 2008

Mid Week

I've been busy, that's why I haven't been back since this weekend to say hi.

Good thing: this week was the last week of doing the Penny Saver route. Bad thing about that: I'll only be getting half of what I've been earning from it, for the candles next month. I may be able to go one more month on COTM, because next month ends up being a 3 paycheck month---but I definitely can't do that for long! :-| But that gives me a month to get back in the swing of things and get in my grove again. Can I do it? Will I again fall on my face? I don't know! But I'm going to make an effort!

I went to my doctor's appointment on Monday. It wasn't an annual check up, it was just a getting back in touch because of my lab work. But the other appointment was part of an annual, in that he did stuff he does during annuals then, and some during the appointment on Monday. All my lab work looked good. I did tell him about feeling horrible the 2 weeks before my period, and getting headaches after chocolate and coffee, though I said that might be more something for the gyn. He said "I'll tell you the same thing he'll tell you. Don't eat or drink that." Which I won't drink coffee again (boo hoo), but I will experiment to see when I can and can't eat chocolate. I got the go ahead to start getting back to normal activity on my ankle. He said I should be right back about where I was in a couple weeks. No more Penny Saver route, but I was dreading it even before the ankle sprain. I'm starting today to go for a walk, I'll see how far my ankle will let me go.

I'm nearly done with my backlog of dishes! Woo hoo! I've got just one spot on my counter with dishes on it, just in front of the microwave, next to the sink, and that only has my worst stuff on it! So happy to see my counter again! I made cookies for an outreach the church does to a local prison, and I was able to find some place to put the cookies to cool. AND, I only ate one cookie! :-D I'm going to be making more, but I don't know which and I don't know when. Soon. I made oatmeal raisin cookies, and they were GOOD. It was good. :-D I gained 2 pounds this week, but then it's the time of the month. Finally. It's taking so long now, I wonder sometimes if I'm pregnant! How did I get from my dishes to my monthly friend, I don't know.

The house is in a state of flux. There are a lot of clothes to fold, and on the back of the old couch there are things (towels, socks, baskets) to go through. And I need to figure out a Bean with Bacon soup where I substitute ham for the bacon (and probably pinto beans for the Navy beans), after I chop up the ham I got for Easter. I already used it for an attempt at low fat/fat free scalloped ham and potatoes in the crockpot. It was good! I'd like to freak on the recipe builder at the Weight Watchers site. It will freeze after the first or second thing I put into it. Whether it be the food tracker or the recipe builder, it will freeze on me and then I won't be able to do a thing.

Good news. Purely by chance, P found the old camera. So you may once again be treated to pictures of my life. Not of such great quality as before, but pictures all the same :-) I'm worried I might have just gone and messed up all the old pictures, that were on the camera before we cleared the pictures, which was just before or around the time of the accident. Which would really suck because pictures of P playing with his blocks are in there! :-( Oh, yippee, I solved that problem!

Well, I must get something to eat, then go for a walk, then go to my dad's so the kids can earn some money. D mostly, but I think I'll be able to talk my dad into giving P a dollar, I know he'll like that! And he'll be able to complete the task some! :-)

Take care, see you later---maybe a Wordless Wednesday will come of this! :-D

April 11, 2008

Back later for BH?

Don't count me out yet---I think a storm's coming, so I'll check everyone else out later. But, have a good Blog Hop! :-D

Blog Hoppin' again!

OMG, what kind of a hostess am I??

Actually, if you ask most people that visit, other than my house being a big cluttered mess, we're actually pretty good hosts! :-) So, here, I've cleared off the futon---today, just in time for your visit---come see the hilarity that is my life, especially March - UGH - and maybe have a cupajoe or I could make you some tea---I've got my awesome Raspberry Quiche (hey, that sounds good), or I could give you straight up vodka water, or maybe some milk? I've got those ToGo water bottle additives---I use them in water of course---another of those misunderstandings between T and I.

We can sit and talk a spell, I'll grab my current knitting project, and you can watch that grow (I don't have a working camera, so you can't ACTUALLY watch it grow), or you can DROP A COMMENT and check out someone else :-)

Updates for us around here: My ankle is healing well. I even went out today for the first time since March 6th (the day I did it) without even an Ace Bandage while I was wearing my gym shoes (which I was wearing when I sprained my ankle). I've done that 2 or 3 time with my dress shoes, but it's important that soon I can do it with all my shoes. I'm eagerly awaiting Monday, with my general check up. The car is FIXED. We've had it a week and a half now. But it needs improvements---a turning signal is going (mostly gone, it's been that way since we bought it, nearly), it's badly in need of an oil change (well, just that it's a month and several hundred miles overdue), and it needs a tuneup. But it's getting us from here to there, and that's what matters most. The kids are the kids. Sometimes it seems as if D is in perpetual "time out". Best word for it---where she has to go sit in her designated spot for an amount of time. But she's a good kid overall. P's growing like a sprout! His vocabulary and speaking skills are growing amazingly! It's cute the things he's getting! Bedtime's still a bit of a chore. He weaned last month. Not easy for me, but it's sorta about time. I believe in extended breastfeeding, so I wasn't resentful that we were still doing it. It just came time for it to end for us. He still knows they're there. :-)

I think that's most of the catch up stuff that those who have been here before need to know. That's good---oh, hey, enjoy surfing my del.icio.us links. I've been having fun filling them up. Go check and see if your blog is under bloghoppin ---you never know, it just might be!!! :-)

Friday's Feast will be back next week.

That's not my decision. That's the decision of the chef over there at Friday's Feast. That's okay, we all need a day or two (or 30+) off once in a while. Like I've recently taken. I really wonder if my down turn this winter WAS because of that stupid hole in the ceiling. HOLES. 3. About when that developed is about when I started feeling like crud half the time. I won't know about my blood sugar levels until Monday, when I have my general checkup. I already know my cholesterol levels. I joked to T, the bruise isn't even gone, and my cholesterol numbers are back! I only had the blood drawn on Tuesday. It looks pretty good---overall it's 165. That might actually be low---I think T said his were about 160, the hospital has this outreach thing with his work (or some such thing) where hospital workers come over and do some health checkups. I can't wait for Monday in that I want to get back to normal activity with my ankle. Sometimes it still hurts just a bit, but I would guess that's normal now.

I'm actually starting to think about dinner already. It's 5pm---that's better than starting to think about it at about 7 like I sometimes (all to often) do. I've got fixins for a million different things, but I always find myself stalled when it comes to dinner. I don't have ground beef, I've got chicken (frozen) and ham (from Easter, but it will hold for a while. The best by date is May something), and even a can or two left of the tuna that T bought a few weeks back. I'm not sure what I'll make. :-| I'd actually like to make a version of that stuff I had way back for our 11th anniversary date, only with Angel Hair pasta. It had onions and tomatoes, and some green "Italian" spice. I use basil (if I have it, which I don't) or parsley (which I know right now I do). I don't usually do the tomatoes (I hardly even have fresh, just canned), but I LOVE cooked onions. YUM. I guess everyone else can put jarred spaghetti sauce on their pasta. I've got to make split pea soup soon---I have the ingredients, in that I have the split peas, onions, and carrots, I just have to cut off a hunk of the ham. So I've been looking at my favorite food blogs. My absolute favorite is Once Upon a Feast and her Presto Pasta Nights (every Friday). I troll them for ideas. They haven't often given me any, but they will one day. I hope. The only cheese I have is Parm...I love it, I put it on everything I can---pastas, salad, eggs...we had eggs for dinner last night. T started it, by making himself a couple egg sandwiches, then I told him I'm sure P would love them (my boy LOVES eggs. I'll make him one, then he'll come back (before I'm done with my egg) and ask for another!), and I had an egg sandwich with salsa on it. D never got hers---long story there. But I have no idea about tonight. We got more eggs yesterday. Went grocery shopping after the eggstravaganza, as I had been planning to, so I'm sorta stocked up. Grocery money's all gone, as I used it all yesterday and what little I have left goes to bills and my doc stuff Monday not to mention the tithe on Sunday.

What a nice little blip---it seems the accident T had doesn't want to leave us alone. I went to check our bank account, and balance the checkbook since I haven't in a few days, and I found a charge from Enterprise! There should not be one on there---I had taken the insurance when I got the rental, but I had gone in the next day to cancel it because we really did learn the first time we rented a car that it was pointless. Allstate covers our rentals, so we don't have to worry. And what's the chance of lightning striking twice? Really? I mean, sure, 3 times with my ankle, but still. Ha ha...anyhow. I called up right away. I called the local office, and complained. The guy I talked to (kicking myself for not remembering his name, though I think I know which guy it was) said that the charges would be reversed, he'd take my word for it---I had the piece of paper sitting right in front of me, so I could tell him what day and what time it was cancelled and everything. One day I could take, but not 2. Then I balanced everything, and I have a difference of nearly $100. My math must be bad. Good thing is that the $100 is in our favor---it's like $90 now, but it will be over $100 when that $44.88 gets returned to us. I'm always confused when I have such a difference! I want to use it---now I've got funds to go out to dinner if I'd like---but I don't want to in case I missed something---like a charge that I forgot to subtract when I was going through the book, or something. But I go over it a dozen times, so I don't know what's up with that. :-|

We went to the store after dropping D at Girl Scouts. I picked up taco fixings and some imitation crab and canned salmon. I'll start looking for crab cake or salmon cake recipes soon. Also, I had a Tim Horton's Hot Smoothie (a medium one), and now I'm tired :-(

Off to make tacos...